5.1 centimetres

That was the size of the tumor that had taken up residency in my left breast. On December 18, 2013 it was removed, along with two cancerous lymph nodes in my armpit. I’m a 42 year old mother of two, girl and boy, so my time is devoted to raising them and taking care of myself and conserving energy. I’ve heard that writing a blog can be therapeutic, so I guess if I can achieve any form of Zen from trying this out then let’s get started. My writing skills are medium to poor at best so please don’t cringe at my deficiencies in grammar and sentence structure. Let’s just say I’m more of a face to face conversationalist or people person, although lately I’m lacking on that front as well (I blame that on chemo). Since I’ve been off work and going through treatments for stage 3 breast cancer I’ve read many breast cancer blogs. When I think of blogging I think of Carrie Bradshaw in Sex and the City sitting at her window typing away, although I think she was writing print articles not blogging. Correct me if I’m wrong?! Anyway, fast forward to today and I’ve finished a double mastectomy with reconstruction (tissue expanders), six rounds of chemo, five weeks of radiation and the beginning of hormone therapy. The next step is having my temporary tissue expanders switched out for implants on April 7, 2015. My expanders feel like tight miniature balloons filled with saline to the max, they’re not uncomfortable – only when I hug someone do I wonder if they can feel them because they’re hard as hell.

I hope this blog will resonate with some. In reading other people’s BC blogs I’ve noticed a common theme – the pinktober frustration or pinkwash, aka the capitalism on the pink ribbon, and not enough of the funds being raised are going towards metastatic breast cancer research. I agree! But at the same time I think having the spotlight on this hideous disease can only be a positive thing. Some people also have disdain for BC awareness month because – why do we need more awareness?? It’s everywhere, awareness, awareness, awareness! Well as an educated women working in the field of health and health research, guess what, I DIDN’T check my boobs every month! If I had (no one will EVER know) been more proactive and felt for lumps, I may have NOT been diagnosed stage 3. What I’m trying to say is I agree with the hypocrisy of it all but maybe the ‘awareness’ part is vital in the prevention side of the debate.

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